Hello

Missed me?
I finally got my booty outside today and walked, thank you Mom. It was work, but I have actually really missed being active. That said: this week, even though I will still be tired, I have told Julie I need to get my booty back in the gym - no matter what. I can not let being pregnant affect my mindset that way. Which brings me yet again to clothing...

I don't really need preggie clothes yet, but a pair of jeans that did not smoosh my belly when I sat would be oh so fabulous. Anyway, somehow when I found out I was pregnant my brain said "Oh you are fat again Laura, it will be hard for you to find preggie clothes like before." So, I have not even looked. Yesterday my Mom and I went shopping. I decided to try jeans on at Gap Maternity. Mind you, I have not been able to wear regular Gap clothes in years. I found some great shirts and 2 pair of shorts for spring. I tried on jeans, grabbed a size 14 to start with, hoping they would fit. Well they swallowed me and the 12's were too big. My friends, I fit into a size TEN Gap maternity jean. SERIOUSLY! I was still stunned later that day. Well they were $70, I decided I could wait a few more weeks. But just trying them on and seeing how thin I looked in them was all I needed.

You will hear more after I have started hitting the gym again. As far as eating...whatever I can put down that does not make me gag!

Happy Sunday!

Biggest Loser

Just finished watching tonight's episode. So not a fan of the blue team. Oh well. I loved watching them totally kick butt tonight. Black team is my fav, and there was not place on them that was not pouring sweat, miss that!

Since I found out I was pregnant, I have really struggled emotionally with it all. Of course, I am very excited to have another child - this is what we have wanted. It just came at a time when I was really peaking with momentum towards my goal. My belly that was getting defined instantly turned into "insulation", my workouts are not as strenous and gut-wrenching - which I love, and I have zero energy.

Aside from all the workout stuff, clothing is still an issue. I was finally getting to the point where I was excited to go and start buying pieces for my new wardrobe. Went on our shopping weekend and broke down. Since then I have tried to find a few work out pants that would work, but to no avail. I've had a real mental block with getting maternity ones. Finally tonight, I found some at JC Penney's. They are maternity, they are cute AND they are size medium. You have to know, that all my previous maternity clothes were XL's. Praise the Lord, I'm gonna look cute pregnant!!!

God's timing is more perfect and sovereign that I can ever imagine. For that, I am ever so grateful. I can not wait to find out what I am having, I can not wait to hold the baby in my arms, I can not wait to add the last addition to our family. Thank you, my Lord, for Your, even better, journey for my life.

Coke

I keep forgetting to tell you all. Saturday we went to this burger joint Hubs has been wanting to go to. I was so desperate and ill feeling by the time we got there I had him get me a coke. 2 sips later, I had him pour it out and get me lemonade. Sips is actually an exaggeration, more like drops. I will not count that towards my journey of no cokes. So to date it has been 3 1/2 months since I have had one. Not bad. I know they pretty much will be gone from my life for good. My husband is going on 2 years w/o one, so why do I need them? I don't.

Preggy Sickness

Last night Hubs and I were laying in bed. I was moaning, on the verge of tears, and feeling completely helpless. I asked Hubs if it was this bad with Son #2. He said "Yes." I was almost shocked at his answer. Surely it wasn't. I told him that God is good that way. I remember being sick with Son #1 and remember with Son #2 being nauseous almost the whole time, BUT you don't remember how it feels. Interesting.

Today after nap time I will get out and walk. I feel so utterly zapped of energy, it's sad.

BAH!

I've worked out about 3 times this week. That might even be an exaggeration, it's been a blur. There were too many days this week where I felt completely miserable. A walk would've helped, I know. Sometimes that preg belly says sleeps is more important than anything.

On the eating, I would not say I have been the ultimate clean eater, but it is definitely not junk. I'm basically trying to eat what will not make me sicker than I already am. And soon, this part will be over.

The invasion of pregnancy on my body has been hard to adjust to this time. The other 2 times we were trying to get pregnant, this one was a surprise. Oh, I am very excited to have another baby. Just not so much about the 9 months of havoc on my body.

So today, I will try and get out for my walk in the nice cold air.

Swim

Julie and I swam this afternoon. I did not really feel like I did that much; however, tonight I ordered pizza - since Hubs is at bible study - let the boys watch cartoons while we ate...I fell asleep on the couch. Son #1 woke me up saying he wanted more pizza! Guess I really did get a workout. It will take getting used to working out and remembering that my body is working double time already growing that precious baby.

This is good for me. I am very excited. Plus, I think me walking or doing some sort of cardio late in the day helps the nausea at night! YEA.

today's workout

Since I would still consider myself a beginner runner, I have put that on hold while preggers. So today I put Son#2 in stroller, Son#1 on bike and hoofed 2 miles. It was a good w/o. That hill at the end really gets my blood pumping even more!

Tomorrow, Julie and I are swimming!

Bittersweet

Have you wondered where I have been? The last 2 weeks have been quite a rollercoaster for me. I will detail this past week, the week before that was just gloomy because I was nearing my goal date Nov.15, and wondered how I was really going to make it. The details will not be in chronological order.

Friday Nov 14-Sun Nov 16: JRo and I have our shopping trip to San Marcos. That place is enormous. Two outlet malls smack next to each other. Awesome! 3 full days could have been spent there. I found 2 sweaters and a pair of boots. It was frustrating and emotional. JRo, well we flat spent every last dime she brought. Oh she got some amazing pieces, that look so beautiful on her and only accentuate her beauty. I'm so proud of you JRo. You relaxed, enough (hahaha) to find some pieces that really work for you and are not so haphazard.

Friday November 14: I go to the doctor (they always weigh you), so I do a semi-official weigh-in. Not my goal, but happy. I have come so far. You can not ever factor in the injuries and illnesses that you will have along the way. I have come a very very long way from the beginning. I have somewhat physically forgotten what being that heavy felt like...definitely not mentally - but daily working on that.

Wednesday November 12: Work out with Julie, it felt great. I was so not satisfied with what I saw in the mirror as I lifted. It is amazing how quickly you can digress when you have an injury.

Monday November 10: Wake up not feeling well and emotional. Had a parent/teacher conference w/ Son#1's preschool teacher. Make the day even more emotional. However, my sweet Hubs stepped up to the plate and made a difficult phone call for me. Spent a lot of the day reeling between happiness, sadness, and feelings of not wanting to disappoint those around me.

Sunday November 9: Wake up with unsettling feelings. Worship at church, more unsettlement. On the way home stop for a few items at the grocery store. Get home, unload head to the bathroom with one of my purchases. I do not even have to wait 3 minutes...I'm pregnant!!!!!!! I show Hubs, he gets the silly man grin of "I've done something!" and I burst into tears.

NOW, all the events of the week fall into place. Shopping was hard b/c I waited for months to do it, then really could not enjoy the fruit of that labor. I so do not want to buy new cute clothes that soon will not fit me. Sunday and Monday, were so emotionally charged for me. Feelings of excitement and sadness all at the same time. Plus, all those you have cheered me on and worked with me - how could I disappoint them? Lastly, as my Alison (SiL) put it...BITTERSWEET! Hubs and I have always wanted 3 children, I just wanted to enjoy my new body for a while. Sweet, that the Lord is blessing us this way. Bitter, my journey took a sharp turn I was not expecting.

Do not take a "downer" mood from me as you read this post. I am very happy and utterly blessed to be pregnant. Just as in me losing weight and having to deal with issues that came with that. I have spent the last week processing all the different emotions of being unexpectedly expecting.

JRo and I have spent alot of time talking of how my journey will be now. How will I take charge of it? How will I not succumb to the "I'm pregnant" mentality? How will I be able to still encourage and motivate others? Well stay tuned...this blog and journey is only the beginning. I will continue my workouts and cardio and eat as clean as I can during my pregnancy. This will be a first for me. I did not do this with the other 2.

I'm still here!

Yesterday Julie and I hit the gym working on legs. It was a great workout, so much so, I am sore today. Of course, I did not do the burpees, my shoulder is still caput.

Speaking of...today I am going to experience acupuncture for the first time. I am praying this will help the shoulder begin to heal. I now firmly believe that the nerve is involved. BAH! So here's to acupuncture...

i'll update afterwards!

2 miles

Finally, I walked 2 miles this morning. Then did 3 sets of one-legged squats, step-ups, and running man. It felt sooo good to be active. My shoulder is hurting, but no more than usual. I'm sad that I can not do serious arm training, but would much rather heal more quickly.

The past few days have been really hard. One, the muscle relaxer makes me all sorts of sleepy. Two, it's quite a downer when I have such great momentum going and splat, I completely stop. I've tried not to let it really affect me, but way back deep down it has. So I will just push forward and try to remember all the obstacles I have overcome thus far. And there have been many.

I must say, it has been nice to be here at my parents house and get to relax and relax my shoulder for a while. It is always way too hard to do that at home.

Julie, thanks for forging on w/o me while I am gone. I look forward to picking back up with you when I get back.

Detox Day 3

Not much going on the detox front. I almost feel a little more bloated than last time. ERG! Probably b/c my body is so jacked up with this shoulder thing.

Talked with my chiro today. I desperately need some pain relief. I am going to my general doc in the a.m. and hoping/praying he has something for me. I know going to him will not fix the problem, just the symptom. At this point, I do not believe the problem can even be fixed until there is major relief for the symptoms

JRo can attest, after seeing me tonight, it's pretty pathetic.

Hopefully by Wednesday a.m. I will be getting some cardio in.

Taps Please

Da da duuummm Da da duuummm Da da dum Da da dum Da da duuummmmmmmm

I was making smoothies for the boys and I this morning. It sounded awfully quiet, I stopped and stirred it and then...nothing. I looked at it, smoke coming from the base. It is officially dead!

I have now sent 2 blenders to mixing heaven!

Detox Day 2

Second day and have not had much activity so far!

On the workout front...I walked on Thursday and that was the last thing I did. As of today, the shoulder/neck pain has become quite severe. My chiro wants me to go to the acupuncturist. I might try that, but really just want a HUGE dose of muscle relaxers. If I am not putting BioFreeze on, I am on the couch w/ a heating pad. I was going to run today, but will wait until tomorrow. I will not be lifting weights tomorrow.

This is soooo beyond frustrating. I have been in the most incredible groove. I know I will get there again, hopefully sooner than later; but I do not want to injure myself further so I will take it easy. ERG ERG ERG!

Mid-week Checkin

Tuesday I had a great bike ride, ate very well.

Wednesday I lifted weights and did the row machine. My dear ol' friend, Knot in Shoulder, is back with a vengeance. I had a deep tissue massage yesterday and an adjustment and it is still painful, even after that. I'm going back to the chiro tomorrow. I am beyond frustrated, and now the pain is almost bringing me to tears. ERG!

Today, Thursday, I am supposed to be running with JRo this morning - we'll see how that goes. I may just have to walk fast.

That is my boring update!

Rockin'

Today has been such a great day all around. Son #2 and I hung out at the house while big brother was at preschool. We went to the gym afterwards. Julie and I killed it. We got home around 4:15, the boys watched Huffalump's Halloween special while I did the prep for dinner, then out the door at 4:55 for a 2 mile walk. Son #1 rode his bike and brother in the stroller. We went the way where we had to go up the daunting hill and Son rocked it up w/o any help; and what used to be a hard 2 mile walk for me was a breeze. We were finished in less than 30 minutes. Sweet!

So today I got in my weights and cardio. I feel great and can enjoy my evening by the fire!

Breakfast in a Blender

Ok, this recipe is in my Eat Clean Cookbook. I had not tried it until JRo made it for me. It tastes like a nilla wafer that has been getting yummy gooey in banana pudding. Which is in my top 3 favorite desserts. Here's the recipe:

1 scoop protein powder - i use vanilla
1/3 C dry oatmeal
2/3 C milk, soy milk, almond milk, etc.
1 T natural nut butter
1 frozen banana
2 T unsweetened applesauce
1 T flax seed
1 T wheat germ
1/2 ice cubes
Blend all ingredients.***

All of these items are staples in my pantry so I can always make this. I don't have wheat germ, but it's not lacking w/o it. I'll get some eventually.

This morning I doubled the recipe. I had one and the boys drank theirs on the way to school.

***Calories 275
C from fat 31
Protein 8g
Carbs 55g
Dietary Fiber 6g
Sugar 28g
Fat 3g
Sodium 37mg

Am I Getting Better?

This has been a great weekend, busy but fun and I did all my workouts.

This week on my, running chart, I move up to run 7min walk 3min. I realized when I was running on Friday, that 5-6min did not seem like enough; by 5min I was just getting in my groove, only to have to stop to walk. Anyway, tonight I started the 7/3. At the end of the first 7, I thought - I could go longer. I didn't, I stuck to the plan tonight. I am completely amazed that it feels good, I can go longer, I am not going to die, my body is stronger and better equipped to keep me going. I am in awe of how far I have come.

Yesteday, JRo, Ally and I were scrapbooking. I was working on Son #2's first bday party (last summer) I showed JRo a picture of he and I - I like this pic.

Her jaw dropped down, she shook her head and started crying. I don't know if she had forgotten how big I was, prolly not, had a flashback, or was just overwhelmed at how far I've come; but, it made me cry - I just pruned up my face and shook my head. She then goes on to say how bad she felt seeing me that way and in a way felt responsible for not speaking up more. WHAT! I told her she was not the shoving crappy food down my throat. But, she did say something to me a few months before I began my journey..."You will never change until you want it bad enough and it hurts more to be where you are than to do something about it." That really hit me. She was right. It took alot of courage for her to say that. She is a supporter and encourager, not a here's the facts gal. But JRo, you will never know how much you have influenced my life. You will never know the depths to which you mean to me. Thank you.

Friday

Yesterday morning got up early to get to JRo's for the garage sale we were having. It is so easy to eat junk food when doing something like that. We managed to keep it very healthy! Yea us! I had to leave for a bit to take Son #1 to gymnastics. While there I got my run in. It was great. 2.03 miles in 27min. Walking 2min running 6min. I'm not so worried about my time, right now, I just want to be getting the cardio in and actually having my HR up and pounding.

We had a fun day! Now for my w/o today...I'll get back to you on that this afternoon!

Hump Day

Well we did the much antcipated leg work-out today. If I thought anything else was hard, this beat it all. Julie and I managed to do all the burpees, but that was insanely rough. I feel very powerful at the moment. Plus I did all this after a 20 minutes on the row machine. Wow, my shirt was soaking just after doing that...imagine how wet I was after weights.

I have to share...Julie actually had damp hair today! The girl who never sweats, had damp hair. YEA! Of course, mine was dripping it was so wet.

Tomorrow, cardio. Depending on my legs are in the a.m.; it will be either once or twice.

Tired

Well this morning I got up and rode at 6:15am. It was chilly. I need to invest in some longer bike shorts! It was an ok ride. My avg mile was about the same time. But my legs killed the whole time. I think I was still reeling from my run the night before. But I did it and felt great after.

This afternoon Julie and I met at the gym and swam. WHEW! It was a very good workout. We did laps, coupled with running in the pool. I have not swam in sooo long, but it felt great to be in the water. Even better to sit in the hot tub after. Thanks Julie.

Leg day tomorrow...here we go!

Watch Out

Boy do I feel conqueress! Not sure that is a word, but I don't care. I am just in from a run, yep, hubs let me go in the dark. For those of you who know him personally, you may now get up off the floor! I do need to invest in some reflective gear. ANYWAY, I'm still doing the 5/2.5 split. It was much better this time. The last run I went 6 minutes...I was on a street and told myself I could not stop until I got to the end. It's a long street!

I have been trying to make myself run on actual ground and not the treadmill. Huge difference. I am not near as fast, but that will come. Plus, I'm not doing it for speed. I'm trying to gain endurance and melt some fat off along the way.

Today Julie and I started the next phase in our weight training. This will definitely put us to the test. I am already dreading leg day on Wednesday when we get to do Burpee's for the first time. I can only imagine what my jiggly butt will do to the muscleheads! HA HA HA HA HA I make myself laugh.

On the food front...MUCH improved today. And 2 green smoothies. Keep it movin'!

Ok, the long awaited closet pics. When I have told you all I did not have anything to wear I was NOT lying. It may look like alot, it's just a bunch of junk.


The only shirt that truly fits is the blue one in front, it still has tags on it.

A pair of shorts, jeans, and a dress. A coat that will fit me this year, and hasn't for several.

Great Start

Well I have a great start to my week already. After church today, the boys had to wait on lunch while I rode my bike. It was a great ride, and I felt energized afterward. This afternoon we went on a long family walk, not quite so vigorous, but hilly. So, I got my 2 cardio workout in for cardio day. I look forward to starting the next phase of my weight training tomorrow. Ready Julie?

JRo and I went shopping Saturday morning. Great fun, and I got a few new pieces of workout clothing...still no day clothes, but that will come. JRo's pics of her closet have prompted me to want to do the same of mine. I'll get to that tomorrow. I'm just too lazy to do it now. It is quite humorous at the sad lack of attire. But you'll get to see my junky shelves!!!

I'm ready for a powerful, energized, fulfilling week. Are you?

Legs

So I did legs yesterday, then ran today. I can barely move right now. I'm wondering what in the world I will do for my 2nd cardio today. I don't think I could even pedal my bike. Maybe some walking on the treadmill with stretches, we'll see.

Food, been doing great. Next few weeks I will be on a strict eating plan, but that will be good for me. I'm excited to see what the next few weeks will bring. Then I will need to get another goal set up for myself. AFTER JRo and I have our shopping weekend in San Marcus, and spoiling at Susan's in College Station. So can't wait for that.

Off to have BFL chili w/ the fam. It is sooo good, amazing that it is good for me as well!

Cardio

Well JRo, your stalking me for today is done. I did cardio tonight. Even though I use the term cardio loosely, I did it. Chiro has me off running until end of this week. So unless I do cardio early in a.m. or afternoon, I'm limited to the treadmill at night. No way hubs would let me walk the neighborhood by myself in the dark. Anyway, walking on the treadmill is equivalent to maybe poking a toothpick in your eye. So boring. I did some hills, etc. It's done.

Tomorrow I will be more productive in my workouts, cardio and leg day. I am also going to find some sort of cardio intervals I could do in my yard or the trail behind my house to really mix up and make cardio fun. I say this b/c the next 4 weeks my cardio will be drastically amped up.

Here we go...

Mental Images

What an emotional day for me...this was blogged through a rainfall of tears...

The past few days, oh maybe a week. I have really been struggling with mental images and thoughts of myself. First being, "Am I really going to make my 50lb deadline?" Yes, I have become quite stressed over it. No reason to, it will be a tough 4 weeks; BUT, I am "me" and that means I will do it. My thoughts are trying to trick me again, in that I have not really done that much to begin with - what makes me think I can make it all they way to 50.
***Stop yelling at me*** I have done alot. There is a reason I titled this post the way I did.

I just finished watching Biggest Loser, the Wednesday show, from last week. Forgot it was there. Well, I cried through the whole thing. Most days I wake up and get on with my workout and day as I would normally live life. Not even nodding to the fact I have lost a lot of weight. I used to think even to lose 20lbs was a big deal. I've lost 30ish, and now think I have not really accomplished anything. WHAT! That kind of thinking will hinder my journey to 50.

On the days when I feel smokin' hot, I think..."Well I probably still pretty much look the same, no one even really notices." Serious. Here is where my mental images really start to mess me up. Before I even lost a 1/2 lb, my mental image of at least my face was how it looks right now...slim, rosy cheeks, bright eyes, sparkling smile...that was far far from how I looked in reality and even from what I saw in the mirror. Now, my physical image looks like that mental image and my mental image has become blurry. Who am I? What am I becoming? How will I physically and mentally look when the journey ends?

I have kept one pair of shorts in my starting size, everything else I have shrunk out of is gone from my closet. I am too scared to even try those shorts on because, mental again, I think there really won't be that big a difference when I put them on. Of course there will be, they are 2 sizes bigger than what I am currently wearing.

JRo and I had a quick but good talk (I look forward to discussing further JRo) this morning. I have 4 weeks left and the lbs I need to lose will be tight. I can do it. She encouraged me and gave me a few good pointers. I really needed that. I am a very determined gal; if I set my mind to it I am going to do - do not step in the way you might get hurt. Somewhere very deep down I think there has been a voice really questioning/doubting if I could really pull this off. Maybe that voice is getting in my way - BE GONE! JRo even flattered me last week by blogging about me living this out right in front of her.

As I have said over and over, I know my inside is going to change far more than my physical appearance. And for that, I will be truly blessed. There were alot of things rotting under the cobwebs that needed to be bleached out.

My journey is not really ending in 4 weeks, it is just beginning.

Now Relax Your...

My chiro tells me to relax a certain spot so she can adjust it. I told her that always makes me laugh. Me? Relax? ha ha ha She gave me a great adjustment today. I can actually take a deep breath without having a stabbing pain in my back. She told me no running, BAH! I refuse to get so desperate I have to use the elliptical!

Today I got my happy butt on the treadmill and worked some serious hills to get my heartrate up, since I can't run. It worked. I have recently noticed something new about my heartrate. It is alot lower and I have to work harder to get it higher. DUH! I've lost alot of weight. Well, Wednesday I look forward to hitting the weights again.

JRo, in answer to the headache thing...I've had very few since I started my journey. And that was mainly during my period. Amazing. I am still careful of things that trigger it. Naturally, having cut sweets out of my diet has helped tremendously.

Today I was squating over for something and caught a glimpse of my legs. WOW! They are really starting to trim down. Very exciting!

Cleanse Day 7

FINALLY! I slurped my last few slurps about 2 hours ago. So the final final will be tomorrow morning when I weigh. I'm pretty sure I've lost at least 7 lbs.

The detox was going along smoothly until Day 4, when it all fell apart and I got sick. I started feeling better on Day 5, but still had very very low energy and appetite. My temp had remained normal until today. It was back up. AND my shoulder/rib hurts sooo sooo bad. I don't know if it is coincidence that I was doing the detox, went to the chiro and it released terrible toxins in my body causing me to feel that way; or, I started the detox and just happen to come down with something. All I know is, it has been very frustrating. I will try the detox again, near my journey's end...but probably with apprehension. It is just too hard being low on energy being a woman, wife, mother, exercise enthusiast, etc.

I have dearly missed my workouts. My last one was Wednesday. That makes me want to cry. Tomorrow I will see the chiro again and lay it out for her. I can't continue to be adjusted and be in almost worse pain than when started. I know I was real out of whack, but this is seriously affecting even small everyday things.

All in all, the detox was good and would definitely reccommend to people. I just had a lot of stuff playing against me for it to work the most efficient way. Amy ended the week feeling energized, maybe I will next time.

I'm off to bed. I've had a headache for 3 days and I am really getting annoyed with it. BAH!

10:25pm

I still have about 1/2 of my cleanse left to drink for today. AAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!
Tomorrow morning is going to be rough! Especially since I ate fajitas for dinner. Good thing I was blabbing so much w/ Jen that Paul had eaten most of them by the time I got around to my first one!

Was that your secret ploy to not get me to eat Richard, Jen and Paul? ha ha ha

Cleanse Day 6

Today has been by far the roughest day. Probably because I was sick yesterday and completely bloated. I woke up this morning cramping. I'm not cramping anymore, but am getting a thorough clean out. Of what, I am not sure since I have barely eaten!

It's funny how being sick and laying around makes you more tired. I am so ready to get back to cardio and the gym. I think tomorrow I will start back cardio and the gym on Monday.

Lastly, today I went to Wal-Mart to look for some workout shirts. I love their Athletic Works brand, for shirts at least. Anyway, decided to try on a few other things. Got a great shirt in royal blue, that looks incredible on me and it's a medium. Sweet! Also, I tried on a pair of pants in size 12, too big! Sweet! I did not spoil that by trying on a smaller size. I really do want to wait and buy the bulk of clothing when I have reached my goal. My one pair of jeans will have to do for now.

It's funny, the shirt I am wearing today is a pretty purple - yes you know the one - and I think hey it's a little big but still shows my curves. It's an XL. When I tried on the medium top I was like WOW, I really do look good! ha ha ha Amazing how our minds try to trick us into believing things that are not real! Stupid mind, I'll bet you yet!

Cleanse Day 5

Well today did not start out so well. Last night around 7:30pm my temperature was 101, and my back was killing me. I went to bed w/ some water and a heating pad and slept restlessly until 9:30 this morning. I can't remember the last time I slept that long.

At first, I was not going to do the cleanse today. Then after thinking about it for a few hours, I decided it'd be worse on me tomorrow to have missed a day than if I had done it while not feeling great. The good thing, I guess, I have not eaten much today.

All in all I feel somewhat better. I just wish this headache would leave me alone!

Cleanse Day 4

Well the drinking part is completely tolerable. Today, I just feel utterly zapped of emotion/energy/stamina, etc. I don't think it is from the cleanse, more from Son#2 being sick most of the week, less exercise b/c of my shoulder AND I went to the chiro today - got all popped back in place and feel exhausted from that. Turns out the problem in my neck and shoulder is from a rib being out of place. Interesting. All the places that were adjusted have been spewing out toxins all day - that is another good reason I am tired. Oh well.
I'm off to rest for a bit, before finishing the day!

Cleanse Day 3

Today was ok. Other than the pizza I had for lunch, everything was good. I do not reccomend having pizza for lunch, then gulping a few gulps of the cleanse. It left me in pain on my bed during naptime. Other than that...it has been an uneventful day.

Cleanse Day 2

Today has been ok w/ the cleanse. Yesterday was worse. I'm sure eating at On the Border tonight will not help my case any, oh well, not worried! The taste is not horrible, but not something I'd want to sip on everyday for the rest of my life. I know it tastes like something, when I remember I'll let you know.

On the fitness front, today was fantastic. I pounded the treadmill while sick Son #2 slept and Son #1 played in the driveway. Son #1 told me I was sweating everywhere. DUH! We just laughed together.

Aside from eating at OTB, today has been good. Not a big fan of left-over roasted broccoli, especially when you run after eating it, but the l.o. salmon was fabulous.

Have I ever mentioned how evil Cheeto puffs are? I think they put some form of addicting drug in them. I swear I have been soooo good about avoiding that kind of food. Last night (well it was the day Aunt Flo came) I sat on the couch and ate them straight from the bag. After 3 handfuls, I was so disgusted w/ myself...at least I had the good sense to put them away!

Later, off to watch Biggest Loser

Cleanse Day 1

Ok, a few items:
I am going to the chiro this week for my neck/shoulder issue. I can't wait. I should have gone when this all first started. I was just for sure it was going to go away. I feel for ya, Ruthie. However, I will be cardioing my heart out in hopes to drip some fat off my body. I noticed over the weekend, even amidst my belly fat rolls, I am starting to get definition there. That was enough to spur me on even further!

Heard of Arbonne? I've known about it for quite some time. Recently, I have really been turned on to it by a teacher at the boys preschool. (www.arbonne.com - so I don't bore you with history). Anyway, the Detox Spa line, has a 7-day Cleanse https://www.arbonne.com/shop_online/showitem.asp?ProductId=7213&menuId=223&withLinks=1. You drink it. This week I am setting aside my green smoothies for this. I will keep you updated on the process and results.

This week also marks, hardcore eating for me. I have been pretty strict anyway, but now will be even more so. It has been 7 weeks since giving up sweets and sodas. I am glad I did it, and I don't really miss it. My journey, the initial weight loss portion, is coming to an end soon; I want to end it with a bang!

Food

Worked out this morning, no cardio yet. Today I did the hanging leg raises for the first time. OMG, THOSE ARE HARD!!! The rest of the w/o was pretty much the same, good.

Today after Son #1's gymnastics class, I took him and son #2 plus 2 friends to Hubs office for lunch. We sat and watched construction work, that was fun. Anyway, my point, we drove thru McyD's. Usually I get a grilled snack chick wrap and tea. Today I decided, why not? I'll get my old usual. Quarter Pounder w/ cheese. There is a reason I do not eat those anymore. YUCK! Not to mention the sodium bloat I've got from it. After all the kids are gone and down for naps. You better believe my butt will be hitting the couch; dumb how one silly thing can really bring you down!

I'm up (UPDATED)

Finally got up this morning and ran. I can barely breathe from my cold, but I ran anyway. Man, it felt great. I'm sooo much better at running in the mornings, why did I ever stop getting up early? I'll be off to the gym later today....

I skipped the gym since 90% of the exercises involved my shoulder. I'm going for another massage tomorrow and hopefully that will loosen it up the rest of the way. Sure am glad I got up and ran! Now to get my tail to the grocery store...we are even out of cheesesticks to munch on!

Cold

I wouldn't say I have a cold, just clogged and faucet all at the same time. Nice. So I took Friday, Saturday and Sunday off. Sunday we went on a family bike ride, that was mild cardio. We had a great time. Funny when you are stopped up salads, good snacks, and all that stuff does not go down well. So my eating has lacked a little, but I'm not upset about it. Still no cokes or sweets. Cokes are always good for a cold!!!

Today I am heading back to the gym, but will probably take it easier than I really want to. That and my neck is still mildly stiff. It is becoming annoying. I am having another massage this week, hopefully that will help.

This week I must ramp back up on my cardio, if it kills me. What good is being toned if I'm not fit cardio-wise. I don't want to just sit and look pretty, I have 2 boys to keep up with. Being pretty doesn't hurt, but that does not shape who I am as a person.

Clothing

Here was a comment from JRo, after I left her a voicemail today...

JRo said...
Congrats on the lack of clothing! haha! Way To GO!

I tried on all my clothes from this time last year and Winter time. Nothing, I mean NOTHING fit. I have a huge pile on my bed that will be going into my garage sale tomorrow. What an incredible feeling. Now to get some new clothes. Honestly I do not even know where to begin. I still have more weight I am losing so I do not want to dive into a complete wardrobe yet. I have bought a new pair of jeans and today got a sweater. The sweater looks hot, will look even better when I put it on w/ a regular bra and not a workout one.

I was thinking of looking at Tim Gunn's guide to style b/c he does a lot of basics and obviously that is where I need to start! I've lived in fat clothes for so long I even have to find my own style. That is overwhelming and exciting all at the same time.

New Phase

This week began a new phase in my training, I think I stated that in an earlier post.
Today I did legs. WHEW! that one is over. I've been home an hour and my hair is still damp with sweat. That was a toughy, but good. I brisked walked the treadmill for 15min before and I think that really helps get my heart rate going for lifting.

Overall a great workout, and so far a great eating day. Love it!

Oh I have to pick on "no sweat" Julie. She wasn't dripping like me, but I think her temples looked a little shiny. HA HA HA HA HA!!!

Insight...it's long.

As I posted last week, this journey has not been just about my physical change, but also a mental change. I have been fed up with letting only part of me be "alive" not even thriving at that. My journey has awakened all sorts of new things within me. The past few weeks, I thought maybe it was Fall coming...my soul is always moved this time of year...but this time, I can see it is much more. I am able to put words to emotions, see what needs improvement, where I am doing well, etc.

Last week, my Mom's Bible Study started back up for the Fall semester. Before we delve into our study, we are hearing each gal's life map/journey. Even though we all know each other well, it is still great to hear. I shared my map. It has ups and downs, heartbreak and joy. Later that day, I was looking back on my story trying to figure out how I could have better told it. And a word came to me....significance. All of my life I have felt pretty insignificant in this world, that there was nothing special or interesting about me, I could not be used in any meaningful sort of way. Oh how I have struggled to be a part, be liked, be wanted, etc. Then, at 35 years old, God places me in a community of women where I actually feel like He might be able to use me. Not only the women be a pivotal part of my life, but me in theirs. Even gals I have known for years are taking new meaning in my life. Crazy!

Being a gal who has been desperate to have true "girlfriends," I am extremely blessed. My Lord chose to put me in with so many truly wonderful women. For that, I am forever grateful.

Ladies...you touch my life more than you could ever know. You spur me on, laugh with me (very important), cry with me, mother with me and seek our Savior with me.

Love you all!

significance: the quality of being significant or having meaning.

Start the week with a BANG!

My neck/shoulder is doing much better. Still stiff, but better. I had a massage on Saturday and that really helped.

I lifted weights today, took it easy on my back, but worked hard. It felt so good after taking a few days off to rest my shoulder. Julie totally rocked it on the chin-ups. I walked on the treadmill for about 15min, but will get good cardio in tomorrow. Didn't want to overdo the first day back.

My eating...much improved. I have not been failing, just room for improvement. I've successfully been planning my menus for several weeks. I love doing it, I get frustrated when I get off that wagon and then everything else starts to slide. Funny, it's like making my bed every morning. If I do that, I start off on the right foot...

Dinner

Scrumptilidy yumptious. It was so good son #2 even tried a piece of asparagus...the kid will not eat anything green.

There are 2 cookbooks I highly recommend...
The Eat-Clean Diet cookbook by Tosca Reno
Eating for Life cookbook (Body for Life) by Bill Phillips

The Eat-Clean book has more advanced recipes but also easy ones. You just have to be willing to give them a try.

Tonights dinner:
Garlicky Couscous (eat-clean)
Roasted Asparagus (eat-clean)
Tilapia w/ lemon butter and capers

It was sooo good. The fish is my own little healthy version of picatta.
Put olive oil in bottom of roasting dish
Fish on top
Few pats of butter on fish
Squeeze fresh lemon over top
Dump on the capers
Cook in oven w/ asparagus.

This meal was beyond simple, and made in 20minutes. Try it, you'll love it.

Biggest Loser

Love this show. It is one of my favorites. After I got the boys in bed last night, Hubs was gone, I sat down to watch it. Since it was the premier, they show all the background on the couples, etc. This part has always made me cry. Since Ethan has been born I have been too big/out of shape to do a lot of things I want to do with him. Even getting up/down from the floor was difficult. Last night, I watched it in tears knowing that was no longer me.

Rewind to earlier in the evening...
I let the boys play on the driveway while I ran on the treadmill. Since my neck/shoulder is still hurting, that did not go so well. I got off and told the boys we'd play on the trail behind our house. They get their trucks and start racing each other. I stood on the starting line with them, counted down, and took off running with them. I looked back at them - with eyes big as saucers they were surprised, amazed, and thrilled all at the same time. I have never run with them like that before.

I almost cried. There are so many little goals within my big goal of weightloss, and yesterday I reached one of them. I could play easily with my boys and actually have fun doing it.

Watch out, my end goal is drawing near - there is no stopping me.

Here is a snipet from a post,early in my journey, that so relates to yesterdays event...

Before I sign off: Thank you to all my sweet friends who support me. I have struggled with my weight since before Ethan and I am sick of it. This is not the person that I really am, or who my wonderful Lord created me to be. I know this is going to be an amazing journey. I know that emotionally and spiritually there will be years of hardness stripped away. AND one day you will see the parts of my heart that only few have seen...you know who you are. Oh sure, I am open and honest, but there are places even I haven't seen for a long time. Yea, I'm excited about looking HOT; but almost more so, to see God's changes in me as a woman, wife, and mother.

Psalm 139:13-14For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb.I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful; I know that full well.

Sweets

I don't even remember the day I gave them up...I guess I could go back and look...found it. Wow! It was a longer ago than I thought. Almost at 4 weeks, no wonder I am having withdrawals. Which brings me to...
Tonight at dinner, the boys had brownie bites for dessert (we were at a hamburger joint), they looked soooooo sooooo soooooo good. I have so been jonesin' for a sweet. But, always, after my tom I am. I withheld. But it still looked good. It is even more fun not to have them, b/c my hubs - as he stuffs his face w/ sweets, tells me how proud he is of me that I am not having them. Last night he even ate a huge bowl of ice cream in front of me...nothing! I told him he better enjoy it because come morning I was dumping the rest of it. I don't think he believed me, boy will he be surprised when he goes looking for it! ha ha ha

Jeans

Had a great leg workout this morning. I did not do cardio today. My neck still hurts something pretty good, so sick of this. And completely blew my eating out of the water. Guess today will be my free day! ha ha ha

Went shopping for jeans today. OMG! That can just suck the fun out of shopping right there. Why is it sooo hard to find NO stretch, straight leg jeans? I did come home w/ a pair that look really good and are a size TWELVE! Oh yea girl. They are not my favorite, but will do until I am smaller and ready to plunk down some real dough on a fantastic pair of jeans. If the weather would either stay hot or get cooler, stop this in between biz, it'd be alot easier to buy clothes.

Mission accomplished, it just frustrated me! Good thing the kids were not with me. ;-)

A First...

I have had such a fun day! Dropped the boys at preschool, then took them to Grandma's house for an overnight, THEN got to shop w/ JRo at the JBF consign sale. So fun. I really did not have a well rounded meal all day. On my way home tonight, abt 9:15, I was thinking of all the places I could drive through on the way home, NONE of them sounded good. Seriously, fast food not sounding yummy? I ended up with a nice healthy delicious Subway sammy. I never thought I'd see the day I'd want something completely healthy over some grease food!

I must say, I desperately want a coke, I mean real bad. I did not cave, it would be too sweet anyway.

My neck still hurts. Tomorrow is leg day, so I will go and do what I can.

Walked

I told JRo this morning I was not going to run, my neck just hurts too bad.
After dropping the boys at preschool, I get home am pretty relaxed, out to the treadmill I go. Warm up for a few minutes, then decide I can run I am not in a lot of pain. 3 minutes later...I AM in pain...bummer. So I walked briskly for 25 min, making good use of the incline at various levels!
Not my hardest workout, but it was a workout none-the-less.
Hopefully, my neck will be de-kinked enough to lift tomorrow - it's leg day!

Candy

NO I have not eaten sweets. But what I had at dinner was so yummy it could have qualified as a sweet.
Our neighbor is Thai, sometimes she brings us over some very yummy food. This week we got Cocunut sticky rice. Yes, mmm hmmm mmm. Tonight for dinner we had tilapia, peas and the rice. I know there was nothing in it that is on my eating plan; however, it was worth every single bite. Son #1 told me he did not like it. I told him he was crazy, it was so yummy it could be candy. Oh, it was so good.

Had a great workout with Julie today, we really spurred each other on, and even get a little laugh in here and there.

Tomorrow I will not be lifting. I have a terrible muscle cramp in my neck/shoulder. We switched tomorrows w/o until Friday; I will just run and relax the shoulder!

I feel pumped, I feel good, I feel mentally and physically ready for more challenges!

Blinders

Finally, got my rear out there and ran tonight. I am sitting here dripping, trying to cool off so I can shower. I ran 2.52 miles avg abt a 13 min mile. Ok, but I was out there AND I kept saying... Relax and Run. By my last 8 min run (I did 8/2 split) I was feeling really good. So the last 2 minutes I bump up the speed, last minute even faster. By the end I really could have kept going. Yea! All in all it was a good run.

Now, some of you may know how fiercely determined I can be, and you can see the physical change in my face. Guess what, it's back. The last couple weeks have been hard training/goal wise, and the last few days very hard emotionally for several different reasons - my goal/weightloss/my self view being one of them. Funny, Alison called me today and left me a voicemail "I was just calling to chat, encourage you not that you need it you are doing so well..." Little did she know - I did need it. Anyway, tonight while I was running the blinders came flipping back into place. So here I am, front and center meeting my goal/challenge/life face on.
WATCH OUT!

I can do all thing through Christ who give me strength. Phil 2:14

Good Start

I started the week off right.
Great workout at the gym, and I hate what I had to do today - so hard!
Great eating!
Yet to do cardio, tomorrow morning I will be brutal on myself!!!

I feel I am starting to get back in a good groove. Stress will not prevail over me.

MoJo

Today I feel rejuvenated mind and body.

I mowed the lawn this morning. I won't admit to Hubs that it was a good little work out for me. ;-) After picking up the boys and doing a few things around the house, I decided I had to go get my specified w/o in at the gym, even if it is only 3 exercises. So I pack my bag and decide to head out on the bike. Secretly hoping Hubs does not have a lock for me. He did!!! Off I go, no wonder I have not been wanting to do cardio lately, I'm out of shape cardio-wise. It is 2.84 miles to the gym. I have a nice sweat when I get there. 2 chest exercises and one bicep, added more weight...lots more sweat. Soaking wet after the last 2.84 miles. I felt FANTASTIC! I did a moderate leisure ride and that took me about 14:30 minutes. Kinda slow, but not too bad. I didn't want to kill myself before I got there.

Anyway, I am glad I got out there did my workout and a bonus by riding my bike. When it cools down it will be much easier to do that with the boys. And Son #1 can ride his own bike!

Anniversary

Hubs and I celebrated our 8th anniverary this week. Last night we were able to go out to a wonderful steak dinner and be w/o the boys until lunch today. We had such a wonderful time being together and chowing steaks. Hubs got the 20oz bone-in Kansas City strip, I got the 25oz cowboy bone-in ribeye. OMG, it was like butter. NO I did not eat that much meat, I have a nice fat steak still waiting for lunch tomorrow. Poor Hubs, he ate all his!!!

Now the good part. I can not remember the last time we went out for our anny feeling so hot! I wore a dress I had bought many years ago when I did BFL. I was proud for Hubs to have me on his arm. Ha ha ha! Hubs looked quite hot too!

This first pic is of our anny last year...

Our anny this year...(a little too much flash)

Now one more comparison
This first pic from Easter (you've seen it), the second from last night...

Active Rest

Today is supposed to be "active rest." Do I deserve active rest? NO. Did I get up this morning to run? NO. Have I worked as hard as I could on cardio this week? NO.

So give it to me. I need a fire under me to hit my cardio hard, it is a main part of getting where I need/want to be. ERG! I'm so frustrated with myself.

Back to a routine

Finally got my menu for this week planned out. My body will so appreciate me being kind to it. Not only is it planned, but I have been to the store. A+ for me.

Worked out this morning, was great. I could barely carry my grocery bags, my arms were twitching! Love that.

Now I'm off for some rest/minor chores during naptime!

Still out of town...

and holding on. Took my sis-in-law to the gym with me today and had her pump some iron too. I also did the elliptical trainer with her - hate that thing. It was a great workout. I am beginning the next phase of the series I am doing. It is going to be harder but I love that.

Eating has been decent, not horrible/not stellar. I have been continuing w/ the green smoothies and that has helped a little. Today I made one and it was not that enjoyable, but I chugged it anyway.

Today and tomorrow I will be working on my menu for this and next week. Hardcore, hold me to the fire. If Julie is doing it, then so am I.

One last item...while s-i-l and I were doing chin-ups today, she told me how hot I looked and my waist looked small and she could really see my hour glass figure. SWEET! Talk about a boost, I think I worked a little harder after that comment.

Out of Town

As everyone knows, being out of town can be hard. Working out, eating right, etc.
I am hear to say, I have at least started off on the right food. Ate a good breakfast, went to the gym, had a green smoothie when I got back...all before 11am. GO ME!

Undies...

Old Undies


New Undies


Old Undies meet New Undies


WOWSERS!!! Amazing when you put them together.

I miss my bike...

I did not get up to ride today! bummer! Son #2 had a rough night. I think he was having nightmares. Everytime I went in there he was screaming about the stuffed animals in his bed. Needless to say, they are all on the floor now. It's hard to wake up early when you have listened to a screaming toddler all night and 1/2 the night they are in bed with you.

I really really wanted that ride this morning. We are driving to Houston this afternoon, and I wanted to get a jump on the car butt. However, I will be packing our dinner instead of stopping at a restaurant to eat. That will help.

I have already scoped out the closest 24Hour Fitness to my parents, it is not far at all. I will be visiting it at least twice while I am away. Julie and I start the next phase in our workout this coming week. I am excited to see what lays ahead.

Shout out:
GO JEN GO JEN GO JEN! She lost 4.5lbs this past week. Proud of you!!!

Quip...

When we left the gym today, I was so so so so close to throwing in the towel and driving by Sonic for a coke. That thought left as quickly as it came. Glad I didn't. That does not help me deal with my child or myself!

ERG!

Well I got up and ran at 6:15a.m. Finally managed to do that. It was a terrible run. I did not even do the last walk/run split. I'm not good at running anyway, so not running in a few weeks greatly hinders me. BUT, I got up and did it, moved my body. So I am happy.

Arm workout today, more to come...

***UPDATE***

Went to the gym was in a great rhythm, in my 4th exercise of 6 on my arms - then abs when I hear my name called to come to the Kids Klub. I grab a diaper out of my bag, usually Son #2 has pooped. I get in there smile at Jama, "Poop?" I say. "No, Son #1 has to leave the club today." Oh dear Lord. Son #1 was racing his matchbox car up the slide, he was told not to. Little fuzzy on the next part, then Ethan throws the car at her. Nice. Jama puts him in timeout, he throws the chair at her. FOR REAL! So #1 has to leave. First, #1 is a boy, but he is never that completely aggresive. I obviously have slacked off on working with him and voicing his frustrations instead of acting on them. We get my stuff, walk to the car where we had a conversation about how upset I was, etc. etc. etc. etc. #1 did have a rough morning before we even left the house. That should have been my first clue.

Now I am home, it's 11:40 and both boys are in bed. #1 consequence for his actions, #2 did not get alot of sleep last night, woke up early and then fell asleep on the way home - he's by default!

I don't know what I will do to finish the workout. We'll see. I'm frustrated, it was hurtin' so good today. Off to enjoy the quiet for a few minutes...

GO JULIE GO JULIE!!! She lost 2 lbs. You rock.

Hanging my head, completely aggravated with myself. My alarm must have turned itself off, wink, I did not wake up until 7:15. I will run this evening.

More later...

Quickly...

Made a great smoothie this morning...

Fresh blueberries (1ish cup)
Fresh strawberries (3-4)
One frozen banana
Little milk
Little crushed ice
Scoop vanilla protein

YUMMY! Helped stave off the sweet cravings!

Night Night

Arms

Yesterday and today I thought of a lot to post about, now I'm just tired and am going to mostly give you the facts.

Yesterday was my active rest day - so I took Son #1 on a bike ride. We went 2 miles in 20 minutes. I think that is great, considering he is 4 1/2 and still has training wheels. We had a blast racing, and stopping for water breaks. He told me, before we began, that we stop when we are thirsty to get a drink, and we did. So cute. What sheer joy to do something I love to do with a Son I so dearly love AND to get to see such delight in his face.

Today was arms. Julie and I worked it pretty good. If I do not have trouble lifting the hair dryer tomorrow, then I clearly did not work hard enough. I love when I am only in the first set and my arms are already quivering. SWEET!

I was chuckling to myself today at how I seem to think I need to be the "small/loud voice" for some of my girlfriends...ha ha ha
I called Jen out about not working out on Friday
I talk with JRo about not perservering to her goal she wants so bad
I nag Julie about giving up diet coke, and going to the gym with me
Like I'm some Tosca Reno of Dallas. Oh I just crack myself up.

Really, I'm just so pumped about my own goals; I see that I am actually achieving them, I feel so great on the inside and out...why on earth would I not want that for my most beloved girlfriends. They mean the world to me, I want them to see that their goals or desires really are not out of reach. They are waiting to be scooped up and taken to heart/mind/soul/body.

Colossians 3:23-24 (NIV)
23Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, 24since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Colossians 3:23-24 (KJV)
23And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men;
24Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ

I did well on my eating today, until the Chicken Picatta I had at dinner. Tomorrow is a new day. Also did not do cardio today; but Julie is to ask me tomorrow if I ran in the a.m. MUST GET UP EARLY!!! Sssooooo....

off to bed my friends...

Weigh-in

Could not wait until after the baby shower to post...

I reluctantly stepped on the scale this morning, looked down at the number. Stepped off, rubbed my eyes, stepped back on. Yep, 171. WOW! I am very excited. After a plateau, I did not think I'd ever get back on track. She of little faith...

Hubs got donuts for the boys this morning, I opened the bag and saw a little donut hole, I almost ate it. Right before my fingers touched it, I remembered - no sweets! I didn't really want it anyway, I just thought it looked good. However, at the shower today, the petit fors and thumbprint cookies WILL be good - but I will hold strong. They do not help me towards my goal, only temporary bliss followed by a headache.

I may go buy something new today to celebrate that 5lbs. Wwwhhheeeeee!!!!

Legs

Oh how they hurt, and my butt. I'm afraid if I go to bed and keep them still for so long...I won't be able to move them in the morning. Then what kind of shower hostess would I be?

Despite how sore we will be, Julie and I had a great workout. We laughed about how we will feel at the shower tomorrow. So glad it is rest day.

I will finally weigh-in in the morning. So be on the lookout for a weight post.

A seperate note:
I went shopping for a shirt, for the shower, to wear with the only bottoms that fit me - my bermudas. After 2 stores, I gave up. I've changed alot and am having to adjust to what looks best on me. I did see some very cute jeans, on a whim, tried them on. I got a 14 and a 12. I tried on the 14s first, did not want to be disappointed with the 12s, they were too BIG! I tried on the 12s...I LOOKED SO HOT! I did not get them. JRo and I are going shopping in a few weeks, so I want to hold off until then.

It is hard to get out of the mindset that my body is a size 16. It really is not the size, I'm a firm believer in that; however, when you have as much weight to lose as me, it's a good measuring tool. I really do think, some days, I still look as big as I did. Then there are the yesterday's when I try on something that makes me look like I've always looked in my head. BEAUTIFUL!

I am so glad to be on this journey.

Nasty...

Made a smoothie for breakfast. Strawberries, bananas, protein powder. For the liquid I tried pinapple juice. GROSS! Sometime my combinations are great, sometimes definitely not. I should have just stuck with water or a touch of milk. Blech.

Smoothie Day

I would not classify myself as a complete failure on trying to do a liquid diet day; maybe just someone who is addicted to eating! I made it until dinner yesterday and then caved. I was so hungry. I know what the deal was...during naptime I did not want to fire up the blender, son #2 desperately needed a nap and I did not want that to wake him. By the end of naptime I was completely starving. The part of the day I did make it through was good. I plan on doing it again, Sunday or Monday. This time I will make it the whole day. I'll make a smoothie before naptime.

I've done great on the workouts this week. Today I will be off to the gym for legs. Cardio will come later this evening. I have a whirlwind of cleaning today, for the baby shower is in the morning. Thank you JRo, in advance, for keeping the boys.

p.s. I weighed myself this a.m., I'm down 3lbs. VERY excited about that.

Work and Toil with abundant Joy

This was the verse in mine and Hub's devotion this morning. It really struck me. Enjoy each day to the fullest, for each day is from Him.

Ecclesiastes 5:18-20 (The Message)
After looking at the way things are on this earth, here's what I've decided is the best way to live: Take care of yourself, have a good time, and make the most of whatever job you have for as long as God gives you life. And that's about it. That's the human lot. Yes, we should make the most of what God gives, both the bounty and the capacity to enjoy it, accepting what's given and delighting in the work. It's God's gift! God deals out joy in the present, the now. It's useless to brood over how long we might live.

For you JRo:
Ecclesiastes 5:18-20 (King James Version)
18Behold that which I have seen: it is good and comely for one to eat and to drink, and to enjoy the good of all his labour that he taketh under the sun all the days of his life, which God giveth him: for it is his portion.
19Every man also to whom God hath given riches and wealth, and hath given him power to eat thereof, and to take his portion, and to rejoice in his labour; this is the gift of God.
20For he shall not much remember the days of his life; because God answereth him in the joy of his heart.

Have I mentioned Exhaustion...

All this Olympic activity plus kicking my workouts back up and readying the house has now taken it's toll on me. I can't believe I am actually going to bed. Maybe this will help me possibly getting up early for cardio!

I had another revelation tonight. I am no longer tolerant of average red meats. Great steak, yes. Ground beef in taco salad, no. Although, the salads have been healthy...add in eating spaghetti and BBQ over the weekend...I am a bloated, lethargic mess. I love how I can be so in tune like that with my body now. Maybe tomorrow I will just do a liquid diet to cleanse myself. Sounds good.

Need a funny story before bedtime?
After working out today, Julie brought her kids and my boys back to my house - I was going for my haircut. Naturally, I give her a key to the house. Much later in the day I leave for the grocery store. Shop, get lots of yummy stuff, come home. Shuffle w/ heavy bags to the door. NO KEY! I know exactly where it is, on the counter where Julie left it for me. EERRGG!!! Thank goodness for a fridge in the garage. I call Hubs, he is on his way home...thank you Lord. So the boys and I play in the rain puddles, til Daddy arrives.

Plateau

I have not lost weight in a few weeks. Very frustrating! I thought I'd lost when I was sick, evidentially I have a great capacity to gain that back. I know we all reach a plateau and then our bodies kick in again, but I'm on a deadline. ACK!
I have started a new workout, and am loving it. I feel a great sense of urgency. Help!
Thoughts? Suggestions? Lipo? ha ha ha Just making sure you were paying attention.

Today, I finally decide to really watch what I eat; I'm STARVING! In a bit I will be off to the store to load up on good snacks and food. Well maybe 1/2 a load, I'm stressing about the baby shower I'm hosting Saturday and that takes alot of my brain power. Good thing I have worked out to give me the boost of energy. Oh, and I had my haircut and hi-lited today, that always makes me work better. Sooo love getting my hair done and sitting under that nice warm dryer. Oh heaven!

Off to the store...

Goal / Exhaustion

I have yet to do cardio today AND I have yet to eat something remotely healthy. Ok, the whole wheat eggo waffle w/ PB was decent, that is it.
Since it has been raining, we took our weekly group outing to Pump it Up (bounce house mania) as well as every other kid in Dallas. There were so many people they closed the session and 1/2 our group ended up at the Galleria playing. Those of us who made it in, met the others at the Galleria for lunch. I will sum it up in 2 words - complete chaos. Julie and I were on overload by the time it was over. Add in my coffee, pizza and a coke - no wonder I was in a coma on the couch during naptime. I'm officially sick of doing this to my body with the crap I put in it. So now I have a new goal...
NO cokes or sweets until the end of my transformation. One exception, my anniversary dinner in September...8 years!

There's my ramblings for today...at least until later tonight!

Taco Salad ramblings

I have been eating Mexican Haystacks, a.k.a. Taco Salad, my whole life. Do you ever learn that it quadruples in your bowl by the time you have it all assembled? I even ate out of a smaller bowl and it was still enormous. Oh well. Just a funny observation.

Another funny:

Today on the treadmill, I wiped my sweaty face on a towel and it pulled my earring out. I picked it up and put it in my bag; went to take off my other earring and it wasn't there. I asked Julie if she had seen it when we were lifting. I backtracked and still did not find it. I told her it was probably at home and I did not even notice. This afternoon while emptying the washing machine...there it was at the bottom. Funny. I told Julie she is supposed to notice if I am only 1/2 jeweled. She repsonded that I was sportin' and 80s look! ha ha ha

Lastly:

I bought a new coffee cup at Starbuck's. I love it. It reminds me that each day is new and to live it to the fullest...

I'm Back...

Broken Bow was fabulous, even if it was cloudy, rainy, and cool. The lake water was warmer than being in the boat getting drizzled on. Too funny. I did not run while there like I wanted to, but I did do legs on Friday. I was not activity-less while away. I ate as well as I could, I brought my green smoothie ingredients - that definitely helped out.

Today, I hit the floor with a renewed determination. I do want a healthy lifestyle. I do want to accomplish my goal weight. I do want to feel spry and quick. I do want to everyday know how beautiful God made me inside and out. I could go on and on.

I still need to make a menu for this week, so I can best accomplish eating clean meals. ACK! But I started off the week w/ a great workout.

Arms - worked them so good. Sore yet Julie?
Cardio - 25 min on treadmill. Not my best cardio, but I did it...no looking back.

Meals -
Eggo w/ peanut butter
coffee
smoothie
salad w/ tuna
coffee
Yet to be had:
snack
taco salad
snack

I'm so glad for autosave. I just fat fingered the keyboard and thought I'd lost all the above. Mildly aggravating...
TTFN!

Off to the Lake

We are off! Wish me luck, that I get in some good jogging and one leg day, eat reasonably well...as I stuff a donut in my face! ha ha ha

'Til I return. Have a wonderful weekend my dear friends!

Carbs

We are going to the lake for a long weekend. Yesterday I made my spaghetti sauce for the night we are to prepare dinner. Naturally, we had spaghetti for dinner last night. I was good and used whole grain pasta, and used a small plate for me to eat off of. Even that little bit was almost pasta carb overload for me. Great! I can just imagine a whole weekend of feeling that way. Today, I will be heading to Sam's to get extra salad mix for me to eat with all my meals, plus my green smoothies. I am thankful for not always wanting carb laden meals anymore.

More after my workout...

Today I began a new workout for the next 3 months, thanks JRo. Arms, were first up, such a good hurt. Julie has been working out some with me - it is really fun to have someone there to work with. I tell her everytime how much I hate her b/c she does not really sweat - not fair. I pour buckets, and she does not even have a drop. Oh well! One last thing...naturally in the middle of my workout I get called to the Kids Klub, Graham pooped. So out to the car to get a diaper, change him, then back to business. Of course he'd save it 'til we were out!

Ran to Sam's afterwards, then home to treadmill. I let the boys play in the driveway - found a great way to get lunges in - drew roads w/ chalk on the concrete. Whew! Got on the treadmill, made it through a third of the workout and quit. Too hot and way too much of lunch wanting to come up. BUT I got out there. I will do it again early in a.m. before we leave for lake, then I won't have food in my belly, forbidden food at that!

p.s. I got a glimpse of some new definition in my arms today. They are so pretty!

another jewelry post

I had my wedding rings cleaned Friday. Oh how they sparkle. They are absolutely beautiful. Ok, the story. Three years ago, Paul and I went on a cruise for our 5th anniversary. Son #1 was about 18 months old; I had not worn my rings since late in my pregnancy with him. After giving birth I never got the weight off and then proceeded to gain about 20 more lbs. For our cruise, I told Paul I was going to wear them. I broke down and had them enlarged, the dream of "fitting" into them again never became reality. Oh, but it was wonderful to wear them again.

Today I was admiring them, still nice and sparkley. I noticed how they somewhat slide around on my finger. Seriously, am I really getting that small? By the end of this transformation, I bet I'll have to have them sized DOWN! I love the little moments like this along the way.

Near the beginning of this journey, JRo and I had talked about getting bracelets to remind/encourage us along the way, not forgetting our goals. The idea came from fellow blogger Chasing Iron. We decided instead of ordering expensive ones, we'd see what the local craft store had. We found some simple but cool leather bands, what we wanted anyway. I have been wearing mine paired with the bracelet from Pam. I always work out in the leather band, to spur me on and not give up. Today, for my unique personalization, I added tick marks on the inside of each pound I have lost. I have a ways to go, but I sure am proud of myself to come this far!

If you look real close you can see the tick marks on the inside.

Arms

I did not get up early this morning, stayed up too late watching Olympics...worth it.
I did not go to they gym this morning, chose to spend precious time w/ JRo.
I did not eat all that clean today.
I did not stick to "no cokes." ERG!

I DID go to the gym at 5pm, shuffled the kids to kids klub, fumbled around with all the people that left work early to workout, produced a good sweat, and looked Hot in my very fitting workout clothes. I abandoned a full body circuit workout, for basically arms and abs. A gal was hogging the leg press, (whiny voice) and I wanted to use it. It was for the best, my legs are still pretty sore from Saturdays grind.

I may not have done a lot of things I should have - oh I did clean 2 bathrooms, sweep/mop, fold clothes and shower during quiet time - but I did the one thing my body really needed.

I am satisfied. Now back to more Olympics. Can't get enough. You?

p.s. the whole reason I titled it arms; at the gym, doing barbell curls I noticed that my arms are starting to look nice. I can't wait to get that last layer of fat off of them. Good riddance.

Back in the Gym

I finally made it back to the gym this evening. It felt good, it's really going to feel good tomorrow. ha ha ha It was great, not too crowded and only a few die hard musle heads. One was using the same jungle gym thing as me and slammed his weights down so hard he shook the thing and I jumped. That really irritated me. Dumb muscle heads, like he's all that. He stunk to high heaven.

Have not weighed yet, maybe tomorrow. I want to get in a good cardio first, and I just don't have energy enough to do it tonight.

Oh, one more thing...when I was doing squats, I was watching my legs. WOW, they are by no means skinny but they are looking thinner. Sweet!

Finally...

I am feeling much much better today! So tonight I am going to do a light cardio work out and see where I am, tomorrow weights. No time to spare!

I don't remember if I have mentioned before the bracelet BF bought me for my weight loss. She lives in Seattle and was down here visiting in June. It's a charm bracelet from Brighton, so cute. Every 10 or 20lbs, cant remember which, she gets me a new charm. In the mail yesterday I got me 2nd charm, the coffee cup. The first is my initial "l". I so love this bracelet, and love dear BF for thinking of doing this, keeps me motivated! Here's a look at it...

In case you weren't aware: coffee with 1/2 & 1/2 or cream of some sort was the one thing I would not give up during this time!!!

Advantages

I wake up this morning and am still "sick." Me and the water closet are becoming best friends! I took a shower this morning and am now wondering if that was a smart idea, I'm so faint. I guess I'll try and eat some toast. Sooo sick of toast.

Anyway, I think there is one and only one advantage to all this...weightloss. I unofficially weighed myself this a.m. Results...172.5. OMG! Still I'd rather not be sick. I'd rather be eating some yummy clean foods than toast and potatoes. The sad part is absolutely nothing is appetizing. I pretty much force myself to even eat the toast. Blech!

Crypto?

I had a big ol' post planned for Sunday, then I got sick. It is now Tuesday and I am still sick, and Son #2 threw up all night last night - gross. 3 other families we play with often are sick. I just now looked up symptoms of that crypto virus, sounds all too familiar to what we all have. Seriously, does that parasite have to infect all the fun water things to do during the hottest part of the summer? Not really sure that is what we have, but you never know.

Here is part of what I had planned for my Sunday post:
In getting dressed for church this morning, my options were very limited. I have definitely shrunk at least 2 sizes in all my dress clothes. SWEET! I did mention in an earlier post abt buying new shorts, well I definitely had to go with the size 12's. WOO-HOO. After wearing the 14s around a while, they were way too big. Great feeling. Back to my Sunday clothes...This is what I wore to church this morning...as you can see the skirt is quite big. You can't see it in the pick but it was so full, I felt like I had a moo-moo on...


TMI - read on at your own risk!

Don't my boobs look great? JRo and I hired a babysitter Friday so we could shop like girls! I got fitted for a new bra, finally. I had been wearing an uncomfortable 40C. Guess my size now...36C. I about fell out when Claudine (bra specialist) told me that.

I really have enjoyed the summer with my boys; however, swimming everyday with a 4 1/2 and 2 year old, can be quite draining - especially on the work out side of it. Tonight, after a pizza dinner and swimming all afternoon, I forced myself out on the bike...grumbling. I start my ride and 1/2 mile into I'm already in pain. Every workout this week has been progressively harder - my weekend away is really affecting me (I won't whine forever abt it, I promise) - naturally I start in with the "I'll just cut my ride short" "It won't matter this one time" "It is hot out here" bit. I was even telling myself the old people who ride "ultra" cruises (you know I only have a 7 speed cruiser) have more pimped out rides than I do. I don't know how I got off on that. It's funny, these workouts always tend to be my best. I shaved a few seconds off my pace, and the scale (even after pizza) reflected more of what I should be seeing.
I love that I can push myself through to the end and not give up during the workout - in the end it does alot for my psychie. And I'm feeling pretty good these days.
I have 29lbs left to lose. I am going to break it up into 10lb chunks, viewing it this way will make it easier to work harder toward my end goal.

Stuffed Potato

Amazing that I can go away for a week to my parents house and do great eating wise, but send me away with the girls for a weekend and I come home feeling like a stuffed potato. Considering the food options I thought I did farely well. I'm sure the BBC's did not help a bit. So I'm on a smoothie diet for a day or 2 to see if that helps.

Yesterday I rode. I figured out that the trailhead to White Rock is open so I can now start going that route. It was a little tough, I'm not used to that route - good thing for sure. I was not hydrated enough and that added to it. All in all, it was a decent ride.

Today I did abs and circuit training. So wonderful to pump some iron! I was going to run tonight, but my foot is hurting and I do not want to make it worse. Hopefully it will calm down by morning or tomorrow evening and I can get my run in.

BIG NEWS!!! I finally found a pair of shorts! One size smaller. I pulled them off the rack, in a hurry, they looked small; I decided I should save the disappointment for home and waited to try them on. I tried them on when I got home....THEY FIT! For real? I even think I could wear another size smaller - I went and bought that pair too. I'm going to let JRo help me decide which ones to keep. The mere fact that I could even pull a 12 over my hips AND button them leaves me in complete wonderment bliss! Things are going my way!

One more piece of good news. I know running shorts get stretched out the more you wear/wash them...but today, I bought a pair of Nike shorts (my new favorite, quality really is better) in a size SMALL! Yes, I still have a lot of weight to lose. Yes, they do make one of my bulges bulge. However, in another 5 lbs and that will be gone. Basically, it is just fun to get to look at a variety of sizes and not have to go to the end hoping you find what you love in XL. Nothing wrong with XL. It is wrong for me.

Aside from being stuffed. I've had a fantastic day in all other departments. Thank You, Lord for little surprises along the way.

Weekend Getaway

I went on a scrap retreat this past weekend. It was fabulous, and a great time to be with my gals and goof off. We had as much fun swimming as we did scrapping. I finished my goal of no sodas until this weekend. I had Sonic on Friday and Sunday, neither of which I finished. Sweet! The food was not all out junk, but not so clean either. Good thing JRo and I brought stuff for our green smoothies, can not imagine how tanked I would have been w/o those.

Hobby House Hill had a GREAT pool and 7/10 mile mowed path. We did water aerobics 3 times, Lynn was a fabulous instructor and told us she even gave us a moderate workout. I can't imagine what the hard ones would be like. JRo and I ran one evening, that was great. I kept apologizing to her the whole 1.6 miles about how slow I was, on and on. She finally got irritated enough w/ me saying that, and how she was breathing heavy. We sprinted to the end, and bonded!!! ha ha ha (inside joke) JRo finished out her run, and when she got back said, "You said you normally do about a 11:45 pace? Well look at this..." Folks, when I was running with her our pace was 10:32. Wow! I have not even run off the treadmill yet. What a fabulous surprise!!!

Now I am back home and hitting my plan hard. 21lbs gone does not give me a reason to slack off. I feel great, now I am ready to physically see more results.

Upcoming Goals: (have not figured goal dates yet)
off sodas again
run the entire MK5K in September
weights 3x a week
have a strong strong core
clean eating, and fun foods for the family

Ask Me...

I went on a great ride this morning. I think running has made me alot more "cardio" fit, I will have to work even harder on the bike. This morning I was able to keep my speed up, on the tough parts of my route - it was easier...all very exciting.

I am going away on a scrap weekend with the girls tomorrow, so I decided to go ahead and weigh myself before the ride. You can ask me...how much did I weigh? 176, baby. 21 pounds lighter. As promised, I took a picture of myself - right after my ride.

Me at Easter, Me today
I feel so great, and so excited that I finally reached that first 20lbs. It is definitely time for a few new key pieces of clothing. My one pair of shorts I can now pull down w/o unbuttoning them. JRo told me the other day it was very sad looking - it's total baggy britches. I finally feel I deserve to get a smaller size. ha ha ha Anyway, please rejoice with me in the first big milestone in my journey to 50lbs lost.

On another note, I have been searching for a water bottle cage that has straps so I can actually reach the water bottle. You know I have a granny bike, but it works. In my search, the boys and I were heading into yet another bike store yesterday and I saw the most fantastic awesome solution...just bummed hubs and I didn't think of it first...

ZIP TIES!!! So genius. Now I won't die of dehydration.

Off to begin a busy day...3 cheers for me.

Heat Stroke

I did not wake up this morning to work out. My mom, s-i-l, and nephew are in town visiting and we stayed up late talking. After lunch, pizza, I thought enough of this. I'll hit the treadmill while mom and s-i-l shower and let son #1 and nephew play outside.

Poor poor boys, nearly slipped into heat stroke coma's. It was 98 degrees and hot hot hot. I did my 8-2 run/walk 3 times, on the treadmill, in the garage, in the heat. My punishment for eating pizza! ha ha ha At least I was able to pass the doughnuts this morning.

So, I ran. I may never stop sweating. I'm trying to cool down and it just keeps pouring off me. The boys are watching Monsters, Inc. in a coma like state and son #2 is snoozing. The best part...I FEEL GREAT! Glad I did not procrastinate another minute.

Off to relax a few minutes...

Miscalculation, but Happy

I thought yesterday I only needed a 1/5 lb to get to my first 20; I actually need a 1.5 lbs. That's ok. I'm still happy that I lost 2.5lbs. I'm a few lbs behind schedule; but, with all the stress of hubs being sick these past few weeks...I think I'm doing pretty darn good. I'll get to that 20 mark in a few days. I have made some big breakthroughs on eating habits and that is just as good as 20lbs.

I'm debating on whether to take my "off" day of working out today or tomorrow. Family comes in town tomorrow and I won't want to be bothered w/ training. Ha ha ha I guess this evening after the heat cools off (ROFL) I'll ride. Good idea.

More news on the running front...last night I decided to go ahead and pound the treadmill - since today was weigh-in - and I did great. I started a 10week beginner running thing...skipped ahead to week 5, run 8min walk 2 repeat 3 times. I did it, I pushed myself through and did it. I skipped ahead since I had already been doing my own version of beginner running. The moral of this story is...I was telling this to JRo today, she is the "runner" of the 2 of us. She looked at me and said "You realize I am only 2 weeks ahead of you, I'm on week 7." ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I actually might get on the same playing field as her? Not beat her, but be able to possibly hang? WOW! Go Ruthie* Go Ruthie Get Your Game On!

*my middle name is Ruth, hence the nickname

Excited/Nervous/Proud

Ok, it's Friday evening...there is a VERY good possibility when I step on the scale tomorrow I could make my first 20lb goal. If I don't it will not spoil my day or workout/eating plan, BUT it really really may happen. It's even more exciting because Hubs was telling me how hot I looked today, love that.
If it happens, you will know. AND I'll post a pic. I did not do before pics, but I'll find one and show you the difference.

One the picture topic. I have been preparing for a scrap weekend coming up; I am amazed when I see myself. Horrifying. I asked Hubs if he knew I had gotten that fat, his look said yes. I asked him why he never said anything, the look again and "I can never say anything to you like that." I know, it has never set well in the past. It is a tough place for him to be in. Anyway, no pictures I'm ashamed for people to see.

Till tomorrow...